Investigation discovery
is my new addiction.
There are so many things out of order right now.
1. Dad, six years with another woman, another life, alcoholic, kicking us out of our own house.
2. Mom’s new boyfriend. I realize my anger towards him is maybe 50% displaced but serious just gross.
3. Boyfriend, I always find myself most drawn to the guy sending me the most number of red flags… so this is my fault.
4.School…. so far.. so hard.. so scary… so lonely :/…
5. Career… needs more school, where? I need to get out of Florida, I dont know that I can do it alone.
6. Family…. well thats always a concern.
Well writing it out like this helps… Solution:
1. Dad, I need to relieve any expectations or unrealistic ideas about this man. Then try to find a certain type of love where I can accept him and forgive him at the same time not forget who he is.
2. Mom, realize her choices are not mine. Provide love and support and most of all respect towards the woman who will always love me.
3.Boyfriend, be the best I can, put my whole heart into it and if it fails, if he fails… I’ll know I did my best… if that is not good enough for him i need to realize my “best” will be more than enough for someone else. Also, no more relationships for a very long time.
4. School. I am a smart girl. I need focus. I can do this… more coffee too. SHOWING UP IS HALF THE BATTLE.
5. Career, I believe will find me when its right. Stay focus on the school to get the career.
6. Family… just love them.
Way to be my medium for self psychotherapy TUMBLR.
as always
… it has been forever since i posted. I probably should have written sooner.
